rachelmanija: (Default)
rachelmanija ([personal profile] rachelmanija) wrote2004-04-09 11:34
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You'll Never Believe This One...

My Dad called me up to tell me this story. It's obviously going into his Grand Story Pot, from whence it will periodically be fished out and displayed for the rest of his life.

He owns a "small" business which employs about thirty people at a warehouse in Santa Barbara. Yesterday he'd been at work for a few hours when a cop showed up asking for him.

"Do you own a van?" asked the cop.

Dad said, "I own two."

"Is one of them a blue something-or-other with the license plate yadda-yadda."

"Yeah, that's the business van," said Dad. "There it is." He pointed out the window to the parking lot.

"Did you or anyone else this morning stop the van to pick up a package which had parachuted out of the sky?"

Dad started laughing. Even the cop chuckled, then said, "Sorry, I shouldn't laugh. This is actually a national security matter and it's already been passed on to federal agents."

Dad said, "What makes you think someone in my van picked up a package that fell out of the sky?"

The cop said, "Someone at the airport tower saw it happen, and we traced the plate to you. I stopped by your house first. The contractors working on your kitchen told me where you worked."

Dad said, "Well, anyone here can use the van-- why don't you wait here while I ask my employees who had it out this morning."

He went into the warehouse and announced, "Did anyone here take out the van this morning?"

Brad raised his hand.

"Did you by any chance pick up a package that had parachuted out of the sky?"

"Yep," said Brad. "I'm trying to open it right now."

He pointed to a bright orange parachute attached to a package, which he was trying to pry open with a screwdriver.

"Don't do that!" said Dad. "You don't know what it is."

Brad held up the package. "It says it's harmless." Sure enough, it was stamped "HARMLESS WEATHER TRACKING DEVICE."

Dad stared at him. "So you're trying to pry open a package that fell out of the sky, just because someone wrote "harmless" on it? It could be anthrax. It could be a bomb. It could be anything!

"I've seen them before," Brad protested.

Dad confiscated the package and gave it to the cop. I haven't heard anything more, so I guess it really was a harmless weather tracking device. And it's nice to know that somewhere people are being alert and efficient yet not paranoid and nasty about security.

I think the rest of the employees are still teasing Brad about white powder and ticking packages.

[identity profile] tanuki-green.livejournal.com 2004-04-09 12:08 (UTC)(link)
Does Brad believe anything he reads? Just curious more than anything else. ;)
kate_nepveu: sleeping cat carved in brown wood (Default)

[personal profile] kate_nepveu 2004-04-09 13:38 (UTC)(link)
All it needed was to also say "Don't Panic."

[identity profile] greypersona.livejournal.com 2004-04-09 15:16 (UTC)(link)
This is a fantastic story! It's so crazy, it's got to be true. And, sadly, I myself might have done a Brad and tried to see what was inside it...
ext_12857: (schadenfreude! YAY!)

[identity profile] octopedingenue.livejournal.com 2007-02-01 22:41 (UTC)(link)
HARMLESS. WHAT. BWAHAHA.

[identity profile] spectralbovine.livejournal.com 2007-02-12 01:50 (UTC)(link)
So, you like flying?

[identity profile] wordsofastory.livejournal.com 2007-02-01 22:54 (UTC)(link)
Hahahaha! I love that story.

[identity profile] spectralbovine.livejournal.com 2007-02-12 01:34 (UTC)(link)
Ha ha ha!

It says it's harmless!!