Is the author female? I'm wondering if that, along with inadequate research, could explain some of the oddities of the book. I mean boys could talk about masturbation soon after meeting each other (am I remembering that correctly), but it doesn't seem too likely.

Does he angst about wiping his own ass and accidentally castrating himself? Besides worry about condoms, does he have worries along the lines of "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex", where in the throes of passion he accidentally punctures the woman?