I agree, a shrink who can reassess is really a nice thing to have. I'm a hardheaded cuss, and don't respond well to the softer side of Sears, so to speak, and thus am pretty wary of potential crackpottery in therapists. I've had more than one therapist start in on a spiel -- one I'm thinking of wanted me to look at a rainbow wheel while listening to relaxing music -- and honestly, if I hadn't been so angry with him I would have laughed the house down. I say, I've had more than one therapist start in on a spiel and lose me completely, and be unable to gauge the ill effect they're having, or even respond appropriately to verbal signals that indicate my distaste.
And then I went to a woman I called Thrush (because she was small and plump and alert like a bird), and she was mushy and encouraging-of-emo in a way I strongly dislike and associate with crackpots, but I stopped her in I think the second session and said, "You should know, I'm not built that way. I'm sure that kind of stuff is important for some people but it really puts me off." And she was able to take that, and she never ran afoul of my wariness again. I went to her for a good 3-4 months and she thereafter always spoke in terms to which I could respond.
(Thrush was a very good assessor of detail overall, and I gave her the name after watching her alight on a piece of information, ask leading questions, and then let it drop when she realized it led nowhere. It's really pretty validating for somebody with my personality to watch others, not even admit to error, but to quietly drop wrong avenues without self-serving argument. It made it very clear that she wanted to help me, not some fantasy-person who wore my clothes; and part of helping me was getting as accurate a picture as she could. Even though, when I read her notes a few years later -- thanks, HIPAA -- I could see she didn't quite get me, she got a lot closer than any other shrink I've tried.)
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Date: 2012-08-08 12:09 am (UTC)And then I went to a woman I called Thrush (because she was small and plump and alert like a bird), and she was mushy and encouraging-of-emo in a way I strongly dislike and associate with crackpots, but I stopped her in I think the second session and said, "You should know, I'm not built that way. I'm sure that kind of stuff is important for some people but it really puts me off." And she was able to take that, and she never ran afoul of my wariness again. I went to her for a good 3-4 months and she thereafter always spoke in terms to which I could respond.
(Thrush was a very good assessor of detail overall, and I gave her the name after watching her alight on a piece of information, ask leading questions, and then let it drop when she realized it led nowhere. It's really pretty validating for somebody with my personality to watch others, not even admit to error, but to quietly drop wrong avenues without self-serving argument. It made it very clear that she wanted to help me, not some fantasy-person who wore my clothes; and part of helping me was getting as accurate a picture as she could. Even though, when I read her notes a few years later -- thanks, HIPAA -- I could see she didn't quite get me, she got a lot closer than any other shrink I've tried.)