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In a climate change apocalypse near future, an expedition sets out for the Arctic in search of polar bears, which are believed to be extinct but might not be. They find the frozen body of a polar bear cub on the ice, way south of where bears have ever been sighted, and bring it aboard the ship. Weird, creepy events immediately ensue. Is the cub actually alive? Is the ship haunted? Are there weird creatures outside trying to get in?
This sounds good, right? Nothing like Arctic spookiness! I was so excited to see what Catriona Ward would do with that!
It's nothing like her usual style and I suspect that she had very little to do with it. In fact, this audiodrama has the remarkable distinction of making me ragequit TWICE. I ragequit at the first big twist, then decided I wanted to find out what was going to happen and also I was listening while cleaning my kitchen and was nowhere near done with that, then ragequit for good at the second big twist.
The performances are okay at first, but get more and more melodramatic as they go along. The sound effects are very loud and intrusive. This led to a number of unintentionally hilarious scenes that were basically this:
Actor: "He-hello? Helloooo? Is anyone--AGH NO!!!"
Sound effects: GRRRRR! CRUNCH! SNRRRRR! SKREEEEEE!!!
Actor: "AGH! ACK! AHHHH!"
Sound effects: BRRRRRR! CRUNCH! SQUISH! ZZZZZT!
Actor: "AIEEEEE! AUGGGGGHHHH! ARRRRRRGH!"
And so forth.
The frustrating part was that it started out as a very promising Arctic horror-thriller. Then we hit Plot Twist of RAGEQUIT number one.
There are six people on the ship. They have brought aboard a frozen polar bear cub they found, which several of them have dreamed came to life. The captain is becoming convinced his dead husband is on the ship. And the computer, which monitors their vital signs, is detecting SEVEN heartbeats!
What is the most annoying and anticlimactic possible explanation for that?
( Read more... )
If this had been a physical book I'd have thrown it across the room. As it was, I ragequit with half an hour left to go and my kitchen only half-tidied.
The Nox
This sounds good, right? Nothing like Arctic spookiness! I was so excited to see what Catriona Ward would do with that!
It's nothing like her usual style and I suspect that she had very little to do with it. In fact, this audiodrama has the remarkable distinction of making me ragequit TWICE. I ragequit at the first big twist, then decided I wanted to find out what was going to happen and also I was listening while cleaning my kitchen and was nowhere near done with that, then ragequit for good at the second big twist.
The performances are okay at first, but get more and more melodramatic as they go along. The sound effects are very loud and intrusive. This led to a number of unintentionally hilarious scenes that were basically this:
Actor: "He-hello? Helloooo? Is anyone--AGH NO!!!"
Sound effects: GRRRRR! CRUNCH! SNRRRRR! SKREEEEEE!!!
Actor: "AGH! ACK! AHHHH!"
Sound effects: BRRRRRR! CRUNCH! SQUISH! ZZZZZT!
Actor: "AIEEEEE! AUGGGGGHHHH! ARRRRRRGH!"
And so forth.
The frustrating part was that it started out as a very promising Arctic horror-thriller. Then we hit Plot Twist of RAGEQUIT number one.
There are six people on the ship. They have brought aboard a frozen polar bear cub they found, which several of them have dreamed came to life. The captain is becoming convinced his dead husband is on the ship. And the computer, which monitors their vital signs, is detecting SEVEN heartbeats!
What is the most annoying and anticlimactic possible explanation for that?
( Read more... )
If this had been a physical book I'd have thrown it across the room. As it was, I ragequit with half an hour left to go and my kitchen only half-tidied.
The Nox