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Branna, who is about to defend her dissertation on particle physics, and I went to a Rosh Hashana party tonight at Raven's place tonight. Her six-year-old son, Robin, whom I often babysit, answered the door.
"Hi, Robin," I said.
He took one look at me, shrieked "AIEEEEEEEE!" and fled.
While the two of us were fixing appetizers in the kitchen, this oldish guy, Daniel, walked in with his girlfriend, who I hadn't met. He blinked puzzledly at me and started to introduce himself.
"We actually do know each other," I said. "Rachel Brown. We met at the Jim Henson Company. I used to have long hair."
"Oh, yes," he said. "I remember now." Pause. "I asked you out once."
"....." I said. Is there any possible reply to that, other than a silent stare of dumbstruck horror followed by a silent stare in the opposite direction?
Then another, even older guy came in when I was telling Branna how I'd visited Palo Alto during the El Nino floods when I was doing disaster relief for the Red Cross, and our hotel had been flooded on the first day.
"Incompetent government bureaucrats," remarked the old guy.
"The Red Cross isn't a government organization," I said. "Though it is pretty incompetent."
"It's like a government organization," he said.
"That may be, but it's completely private. So you ought to like it."
He then opined that in cases of widespread disaster, neighbors just ought to help each other and that would be better than any organizations doing anything.
I pointed out that your neighbors might all be flooded too.
Branna pointed out that some neighbors are better than others.
"That's true," I said. "I'm pretty sure one of my neighbors stole my laptop."
The old guy started talking to someone else.
At the end of the party, some of the women asked Branna what exactly her dissertation was about.
"Well, you know that atoms have neutrons," she said. "And you know that neutrons decay..."
Robin stuck a long stick with a blue parakeet on the end of it into my face.
"Uh, thanks," I said, accepting the parakeet.
"...And then it becomes a proton..."
A green parakeet flew into the room and began circling Branna's head.
"...So then a particle called a neutrino is created..."
"Catch it, catch it!" squealed a troupe of stampeding children.
"Cheep!" cheeped the parakeet, fluttering in the opposite direction.
"...And then it becomes a different element..."
"Can I hold it?" asked a small girl, regarding the blue parakeet. "Will it tickle?"
"No, I wanna hold it," said another small child.
The green parakeet made a break for the other side of the room.
"Catch it, catch it!" said the children who weren't begging for the bird in my hand.
"We're putting them away now," said a parent.
"...So then the neutrino..."
"Perhaps you should explain this with reference to parakeets," I suggested. "If the blue one is a neutron and the green one is an electron..."
"Not a bad idea," said Branna. "OK, imagine that the blue parakeet is matter, and the green one is antimatter..."
"IT'S GETTING AWAY!" shrieked a child.
"Does any of this have any practical application?" inquired the old anti-government guy.
Branna said, "As (someone I forget) said to Queen Victoria, "Madam, I cannot say what we will discover, but perhaps some day you will find a way to tax it."
On that note, we took off.
"Hi, Robin," I said.
He took one look at me, shrieked "AIEEEEEEEE!" and fled.
While the two of us were fixing appetizers in the kitchen, this oldish guy, Daniel, walked in with his girlfriend, who I hadn't met. He blinked puzzledly at me and started to introduce himself.
"We actually do know each other," I said. "Rachel Brown. We met at the Jim Henson Company. I used to have long hair."
"Oh, yes," he said. "I remember now." Pause. "I asked you out once."
"....." I said. Is there any possible reply to that, other than a silent stare of dumbstruck horror followed by a silent stare in the opposite direction?
Then another, even older guy came in when I was telling Branna how I'd visited Palo Alto during the El Nino floods when I was doing disaster relief for the Red Cross, and our hotel had been flooded on the first day.
"Incompetent government bureaucrats," remarked the old guy.
"The Red Cross isn't a government organization," I said. "Though it is pretty incompetent."
"It's like a government organization," he said.
"That may be, but it's completely private. So you ought to like it."
He then opined that in cases of widespread disaster, neighbors just ought to help each other and that would be better than any organizations doing anything.
I pointed out that your neighbors might all be flooded too.
Branna pointed out that some neighbors are better than others.
"That's true," I said. "I'm pretty sure one of my neighbors stole my laptop."
The old guy started talking to someone else.
At the end of the party, some of the women asked Branna what exactly her dissertation was about.
"Well, you know that atoms have neutrons," she said. "And you know that neutrons decay..."
Robin stuck a long stick with a blue parakeet on the end of it into my face.
"Uh, thanks," I said, accepting the parakeet.
"...And then it becomes a proton..."
A green parakeet flew into the room and began circling Branna's head.
"...So then a particle called a neutrino is created..."
"Catch it, catch it!" squealed a troupe of stampeding children.
"Cheep!" cheeped the parakeet, fluttering in the opposite direction.
"...And then it becomes a different element..."
"Can I hold it?" asked a small girl, regarding the blue parakeet. "Will it tickle?"
"No, I wanna hold it," said another small child.
The green parakeet made a break for the other side of the room.
"Catch it, catch it!" said the children who weren't begging for the bird in my hand.
"We're putting them away now," said a parent.
"...So then the neutrino..."
"Perhaps you should explain this with reference to parakeets," I suggested. "If the blue one is a neutron and the green one is an electron..."
"Not a bad idea," said Branna. "OK, imagine that the blue parakeet is matter, and the green one is antimatter..."
"IT'S GETTING AWAY!" shrieked a child.
"Does any of this have any practical application?" inquired the old anti-government guy.
Branna said, "As (someone I forget) said to Queen Victoria, "Madam, I cannot say what we will discover, but perhaps some day you will find a way to tax it."
On that note, we took off.
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