Dangerous Jam

http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-mew-prop-8-10042010,0,2637476,full.story

This isn't the end of the legal battle, but for now, let's all raise our voices in a chorus of GAY MARRIAGE YAY!

Yesterday night, when I had a long and grueling tech rehearsal for the Virginia Avenue Project (a theatre mentoring group for low-income kids that I've volunteered with for the last fourteen years), summed up my feelings about the last election: joy and sorrow, anger and hope.

The kids were overjoyed at Obama's victory, and sad and angry and confused at the passage of the discriminatory Prop 8. They told me they ran to friends' houses and banged on the doors cheering, and asked me how anyone could seriously believe that children didn't already know that some people are gay, and why it mattered to anyone whether or not someone else got married.

These kids are Asian, white, Latino/a, African-American, and probably other mixtures and races that I'll only know if it happens to come up in conversation. They're all under eighteen, and eager to vote when they're old enough. They wrote the plays we're teching-- one about a gay man trying to get up his nerve to come out to his parents.

I've already seen a lot of blame being handed out to certain groups, primarily African-Americans and Mormons, for the passage of Prop 8. There's nothing wrong with looking at the demographics of the vote. But let's neither forget that there's plenty of blame to go around-- no racial group that I know of had less than about 49% of its total voters voting for Prop 8 and against justice and equality-- and let's not become the forces of the very hatred and group stereotyping that we deplore in others.

If the Presidential election was consistent with pre-election polling, military veterans, white men, and people over the age of fifty, as groups, voted for McCain. As a group, Latinos, African-Americans, Mormons, and people over the age of fifty voted for Proposition 8. But I cheered for Obama and booed the passage of Prop 8 with a male Latino/white military veteran, and the next day I did the same with senior citizens, African-Americans, and Mormons. And even teenagers are not a right-thinking monolith, though I have to say that spending time with my small, self-selected crew of them gives me a lot of hope for the future.

Groups are made of individuals. Stereotypes are not reality. Plenty of GLBT people are also African-American or Mormon. When we meet the enemy, let it not be us.

Here's a good column on the subject by the always-worthwhile Ta-Nehisi Coates on Prop 8. His commenters, generally an intelligent bunch, are also worth reading. I didn't read all of them, but the first few were right on the money.

Also, livelongnmarry will return to continue the fight. Backstage machinations are ongoing. An announcement of our new direction should be up within the next week or so.

kinsugi won one of my livelongnmarry auctions and requested a Mushishi story. Here it is.

Last night I volunteered at a phone bank for Equality For All, the campaign to defeat the evil proposition on the California ballot this November to ban marriage between same-sex couples. We were trying to raise money and recruit volunteers.

The organizers cleverly suggested that we begin by calling people we know before moving on to lists culled from "contact me" sign-up sheets. I would not have thought of that, but I used personal contacts to raise $300 (my totals were the group's highest overall; I think I am good at fundraising) and obtain one volunteer, and the guy next to me called his college buddies and assembled a team of volunteers.

Before we began, we introduced ourselves and our reasons for being there. One woman said that as a black woman, she would have been legally denied civil rights in earlier times, and this struck her as a similar battle. A bunch of the men said they hoped to get married some day, either to a particular man or just in general. One of the people I spoke to on the phone said that her church had organized a campaign to raise awareness against the amendment in local farmer's markets! Others mentioned being strongly affected by this pro-marriage equality commercial.

As I drove home, I thought about how causes seem to choose us as much as we choose them. I don't like weddings. I don't like how you really have to fight to make them not commercialist, frou-frou and frilly, about enforced creepy gender roles, insanely expensive, incredibly depressing to single attendees, and long and boring. I don't like attending them, and the thought of ever having one myself does not exactly fill me with glee. As for marriage itself, I don't abhor the institution, but neither does it thrill me. So what is the single cause that has engaged me the most in the last five years or so? Marriage equality!

If I were to choose which cause I intellectually think is most important, it would probably be global warming and other potentially catastrophic environmental issues. Followed by world poverty, global inequality, famine, disease, war, and other issues that kill people in large numbers every day.

Out of all of those, the only ones that I've ever actually hit the streets for are AIDS-related issues and anti-war activism over specific wars. (And suspect that I am becoming even more of a peacenik than I was before due to now having a particular person whom I would like to keep out of the war zone.) The other causes that I've been seriously involved in over a span of years are GLBT rights, mentoring children, and emergency preparedness.

Though people can and do die as a direct or indirect result of being deprived of their civil rights, marriage equality, like mentoring children, seems a bit like small potatoes in the grand global "so many preventable deaths per minute" scheme of things. But every individual life is small potatoes on that scale.

Having grown up among people who were devoting themselves to grand ideals (union with God) while not noticing or caring about the very small-scale, but very real human suffering going on right in front of them, I think that even if the ideal is to tackle the biggest issues first, there's also value in fixing the things that you actually have the capability of fixing.

And passion lends capability. While swimming might be the ideal exercise for me, I don't enjoy swimming, so I never get around to actually doing any. Whereas I am willing to go do less ideal exercise if I actually enjoy it. Likewise, my passion, rather inexplicably, is leaping up and shouting, "Hit the streets to promote more marriages! Yeah brides!" and passing out on the sofa at the thought of global warming or malaria. Marriage equality it is!

What causes personally engage you guys? Is it clear why, or is it slightly inexplicable to you too? Are they different from what you would consider ideal or primarily important, or are they the same?

1. livelongnmarry has raised over $43,000 -- and is still counting!

2. Someone tipped off George Takei and Brad Altman, and they sent us a message of thanks and support!

3. Adrian: still awesomest boyfriend ever.

4. I have trimmed and dyed my hair red. Well, red-brown. It looks good, if I do say so myself.

5. Virginia Avenue Project summer camp is this weekend. I am not sure if I'll internet access or not, so if you desperately need me between Thursday and Sunday, call.

Sherwood Smith and I are offering a signed copy of our Avatar the Last Airbender spec script. This is a one-time offer, and the script may not be duplicated or distributed. For your eyes only!

Though we apparently KILLED LJ earlier, we are now up and running! Go forth and bid!

Heads up that some people are still preparing offers, so keep checking the comm. Ellen Kushner and a very exciting Surprise Guest will be posting a truly amazing offer soon.

Since I'm too lazy to do a ton of links, note the tag list to the right side of livelongnmarry. Click on seller: [Lj name] to find all their offers.

I have offered original or fan fic. And also a professional critique.

Sherwood Smith (sartorias) is offering a hand-drawn map of her world.

Noted pro erotica writer Hanne Blank (misia) is offering an erotica-writing boot camp.

pameladean, marthawells, Steve Berman (mroctober), and many more pro writers are offering signed (and sometimes rare) editions of their books.

Kate Elliot and Elizabeth Bear (matociquala) are offering professional critiques.

Justine Larbalestier (justinelavaworm) will name a character in her next book after you!

smillaraaq, copperwise, and many more are offering gorgeous handmade jewelry.

gaudior is offering a consultation to help you find a therapist! (The "offered: misc services" tag is worth perusing.)

All this, plus art, fanfic, baked goods, knit goods, home-made soap, web design, fashion consultation, custom My Little Ponies, original music, and hand-turned dildos!

lady_ganesh and I have created livelongnmarry, a fandom fundraising auction for marriage equality. It went live today, and you may sign up now. Bidding opens July 1, and closes July 15.

Live Long and Marry will raise funds to fight the discriminatory anti-marriage bill which will be on the California, USA ballot in November. Right now same sex couples can legally marry in California. If this bill passes, it will legally destroy those marriages without the consent of the married couples.

Including George Takei's! Look at him and Brad in my icon: aren't they happy and sweet? They deserve to have their love and commitment and responsibilities to their relationship legally safeguarded and acknowledged. And so do all other married couples.

You can help! Here's how you can:

1. Spread the word! Please publicize and link to the community.

2. Bid! Amazing goodies will be offered, such as fanfic, original fic, art, cookies, and much more! We have gorgeous jewelry, signed novels by Martha Wells and Steve Berman, an art commission from telophase, and much more!

3. Sell! Offer something you can give, and help raise money for a truly joyous cause. Detailed directions for making a selling post are in the user info.

If you want to sell, PLEASE announce it on your own LJ as well, so your friends will know you're offering something.


Thanks to musesfool, octopedingenue, astolat, lithium_doll, janni, sartorias, and kate_nepveu for their pre-launch advice and support.