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rachelmanija Jan. 8th, 2016 02:24 am)
rachelmanija Jan. 8th, 2016 02:24 am)In early November, I was prescribed a medication called Elavil, which is best-known as an old-school tricyclic antidepressant but which is also used for chronic pain. I was using it for the latter, as it was then believed that I had a chronic pain condition. (This is almost certainly not the case.) It typically has very sedating properties, and is sometimes used as a sleeping pill. I took it for four days, and during that time I was unable to sleep for more than three hours per 24-hour period, and for no longer than about 45 minutes at a time. This was not a manic episode. It was just physically impossible to sleep.
It is now over two months later. The medication has long since left my system, but I have not been able to sleep normally ever since. (in the interim, I also briefly tried Cymbalta, which had a similar though less severe effect.) I have tried something like nine different sleeping pills, sedatives, and combinations thereof, and every single one has either had no effect whatsoever, or else sort of worked (that is, it allowed me to get about six or seven hours of sleep - I normally get eight to ten) for about three days, then stopped working and never worked again.
In short, for the past two months I have averaged about 4-5 hours of sleep per 24-hour cycle. This is not normal insomnia. It does not respond to sleep hygiene or melatonin, in addition to not responding to drugs. It is not caused by anxiety or other psychological factors. I am currently taking 10mg of Valium before bed. This has been a total failure in terms of allowing me to sleep, but I promise you, I am not anxious on 10mg of Valium. As far as I can tell, the Elavil had a long-lasting effect on the part of my brain that regulates sleep, which I am hoping to God is not permanent given that 1) I am fucking exhausted, 2) I seem to be effectively immune to sedatives.
It is possible to survive indefinitely on very little sleep. Obviously, four hours is enough to keep me going, and just enough that I don't accumulate enough sleep debt that I can ever sleep for much longer than that.
I am going to attempt a hard reboot of my sleep center by not sleeping at all for two nights in a row (approximately 64 hours, counting the next day), starting tonight. I am hoping that will produce enough exhaustion that I will be able to sleep for eight hours or so when I finally do sleep, and that if I can manage that once more-or-less naturally, I might be able to re-set my sleep center to normal. (I chose 2 nights because 1 is probably insufficient given the magnitude of the problem, and 3 is edging into scary territory - that is where people sometimes start hallucinating, for instance.)
Pro: Might work. Not dangerous or harmful. (I won't drive, obviously).
Con: Will not be fun. May not work, in which case I will end up more exhausted than ever. Will be extra-difficult because 1) I am already extra-exhausted due to basically not sleeping for two months, 2) I am taking sedatives (Valium) and cannot stop taking them due to withdrawal.
Anyway, since I need to stay awake and writing is more awake-making than reading, I may attempt to catch up on book reviews. Please comment if you feel so moved. Or randomly email me. Anything to keep me awake. I need to not sleep AT ALL until about 11:00 PM Saturday night. (Microsleeps are probably okay and inevitable. But no more than a minute or so a a time.)
It is now over two months later. The medication has long since left my system, but I have not been able to sleep normally ever since. (in the interim, I also briefly tried Cymbalta, which had a similar though less severe effect.) I have tried something like nine different sleeping pills, sedatives, and combinations thereof, and every single one has either had no effect whatsoever, or else sort of worked (that is, it allowed me to get about six or seven hours of sleep - I normally get eight to ten) for about three days, then stopped working and never worked again.
In short, for the past two months I have averaged about 4-5 hours of sleep per 24-hour cycle. This is not normal insomnia. It does not respond to sleep hygiene or melatonin, in addition to not responding to drugs. It is not caused by anxiety or other psychological factors. I am currently taking 10mg of Valium before bed. This has been a total failure in terms of allowing me to sleep, but I promise you, I am not anxious on 10mg of Valium. As far as I can tell, the Elavil had a long-lasting effect on the part of my brain that regulates sleep, which I am hoping to God is not permanent given that 1) I am fucking exhausted, 2) I seem to be effectively immune to sedatives.
It is possible to survive indefinitely on very little sleep. Obviously, four hours is enough to keep me going, and just enough that I don't accumulate enough sleep debt that I can ever sleep for much longer than that.
I am going to attempt a hard reboot of my sleep center by not sleeping at all for two nights in a row (approximately 64 hours, counting the next day), starting tonight. I am hoping that will produce enough exhaustion that I will be able to sleep for eight hours or so when I finally do sleep, and that if I can manage that once more-or-less naturally, I might be able to re-set my sleep center to normal. (I chose 2 nights because 1 is probably insufficient given the magnitude of the problem, and 3 is edging into scary territory - that is where people sometimes start hallucinating, for instance.)
Pro: Might work. Not dangerous or harmful. (I won't drive, obviously).
Con: Will not be fun. May not work, in which case I will end up more exhausted than ever. Will be extra-difficult because 1) I am already extra-exhausted due to basically not sleeping for two months, 2) I am taking sedatives (Valium) and cannot stop taking them due to withdrawal.
Anyway, since I need to stay awake and writing is more awake-making than reading, I may attempt to catch up on book reviews. Please comment if you feel so moved. Or randomly email me. Anything to keep me awake. I need to not sleep AT ALL until about 11:00 PM Saturday night. (Microsleeps are probably okay and inevitable. But no more than a minute or so a a time.)
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