Next year in Jerusalem

[rachelmanija]

Improvised from limited materials, scattered and separated, in a time of plague, living under an evil pharaoh, deciding whether to go with the word or the spirit of the law: this is going to be the most Jewish Passover ever.

I'm doing mine myself for the first time, over Zoom with the friends whose home I would normally be at. I'm not very observant, so I am not being strict AT ALL. Here's my plans and thoughts - please feel free to make suggestions.

I've emailed a neighbor to see if she can give me a bottle of wine, as I only have whiskey, beer, and sake.

I do not have matzo. I'm planning to make my own. In 18 minutes, just to see how that works out.

I have chicken broth and vegetables, but only AP and bread flour. I have eggs and also noodles. Should I attempt to make matzo balls from flour, or do noodles instead? (I think I'd lose my mind making enough matzo to grind into flour, especially as I have neither a food processor nor a mortar.)

I have apples and pistachios, from which I plan to make charoset.

I think I have horseradish sauce somewhere in the fridge. If I don't, what's a good substitute? I have fresh garlic, lots of fresh herbs, and powdered spices.

I have eggs. Has anyone ever tried roasting rather than boiling them?

I have a confit duck leg that I'm going to use for both my main dish and the shank bone. Or I could roast a carrot for the shank bone.

I have parsley and many other herbs.

Please feel free to make suggestions in comments. I'd also love to hear your plans and thoughts on your own Passovers!

ETA: Neighbor is buying me wine (she's hitting Trader Joe's tomorrow morning anyway) and is also leaving me a jar of homemade chicken stock she made yesterday!

Comments

[kulturschnepfe]

Hi, about the eggs: What do you mean by roasting? Baking in the oven? Never tried it myself, but here's a recipe I came across

https://andreadekker.com/fool-proof-hard-boiled-eggs/

I'm wary of the amount of energy she uses up running the oven as compared to a good five to seven minute boil in hot water, but I'm no expert.

I'm not Jewish, so I don't celebrate Passover. Easter ... yes, my own way, by reading Krabat by Otfried Preußler in the days surrounding it, making an artichoke pizza and having that while watching Quo Vadis, ever so mildly drunk on the two glasses of wine or the one bottle of beer I'll have with my pizza. I usually sleep through about a third of the movie. I don't drink very much and alcohol always makes me sleepy. It's my idea of a successful Easter. Why? I haven't got the foggiest. It somehow happened when I began living alone after my divorce, and now, 20 years on, I still like it too much to give it up.

Hope you are safe and well this Passover.

[rachelmanija]

Some of the texts specify a roasted egg. I've only ever seen it boiled, but got to wondering if roasted really did mean roasted.

Your Easter sounds lovely.

[sovay]

(I think I'd lose my mind making enough matzo to grind into flour, especially as I have neither a food processor nor a mortar.)

If you put the matzah in a plastic bag (ziploc ideal, but a produce bag tied in a knot to close it will also do) and hit it repeatedly with something heavy, you will get a sufficient meal to make kneydlakh with. Like, three pieces of matzah nets you about a dozen kneydlakh. It does not take forever and the hitting things part might even be cathartic.

Our two apples are at the stage where they could be eaten if baked but would be grainy if raw, so I am planning to make a variant on Sephardi charoses with chopped dates and apricots.

My family has used a suitable-looking vegetable as a substitute bone for years, so fortunately we have carrots and ginger root and one of these will be the sacrificial object.

We have no wine, either, and that may just be how it is this year.

[rachelmanija]

Oh! Thanks, I think I'll try that, then. I will use a hammer and pretend that I'm bashing a certain orange someone's head in.

I am determined to get wine. I'm sure a neighbor will come through.

[vaznetti]

Good luck with the matzoh! I remember making it once in Hebrew school, and ours was pretty inedible, sadly. It needs to be as thin as humanly possible, I think.

I don't think you can make matzoh balls from flour -- but you can make some other kind of dumpling. I have heard that if you roast eggs without boiling them first they explode, but apparently people do sometimes roast eggs over an actual fire by sticking a skewer through them so who knows!

The Sephardi use romaine lettuce in place of horseradish, so I think you could use any relatively bitter green (arugula? chicory?). A roasted beet is the "proper" replacement for the shankbone but I think you can use the duck leg or a roasted carrot, whichever you want.

We are "going" to a huge zoom seder for the first night, very early to accomodate small children, and then will have the second night just the three of us at home. I have in the past done two seders at home so in that respect it isn't completely out of the ordinary but it certainly feels weird. Especially because I was planning to have about a dozen people on the 2nd night! So far I've made the haroset and brisket and matzoh balls and am defrosting the soup, and tomorrow just the cake and vegetables, and of course setting the table and doing the plate.

Happy Passover!

[rachelmanija]

Happy Passover to you too!

Thanks for the suggestions! Especially the one about the beet. I have beets that really need to be roasted anyway, so I will do that.

I have lots of greens and can easily use romaine lettuce or something similar.

[carbonel]

I remember making [matzoh] once in Hebrew school, and ours was pretty inedible, sadly.

Someone on the chat thread on one of my Ravelry groups was bemoaning the fact that she hadn't been able to obtain shmurah matzoh. I was very tempted to suggest that she just substitute cardboard, since no one would be likely to notice (but I refrained).

I will be trying to attend a Zoom seder with relatives in Florida and Chicago, but at this point I think my Seder plate is going to be a virtual one.

[hamsterwoman]

I think I have horseradish sauce somewhere in the fridge. If I don't, what's a good substitute?

I don't know that it's a GOOD substitute, but I have personally used a regular radish instead of horse radish (obviously, you don't spread it, then). We've also used arugula or mustard greens.

But in terms of spreadable stuff, wasabi? (if you have some packets from take-out sushi or whatever)

Good luck with the matzos! (We have a couple of boxes we found this year, and a case from last year, I think. I might actually have to leave it for the people actually giving up leavened bread for the week, instead of eating matzos because I like the taste...)

[naomikritzer]

Wasabi was going to be my suggestion.

[kass]

Yay homemade matzah!

For horseradish, I would say: anything sharp / spicy. Wasabi paste. Even a raw onion or raw garlic. Or make something wasabi-like out of all of the above.

I usually boil my eggs, then poke tiny holes in one of them, then attempt to roast it a bit after it's hardboiled. But poking the holes is essential -- otherwise the eggs explode in the oven.

And OOOH confit duck leg for both food and shank bone; that is awesome.

Matzah balls are really just flour dumplings made with matzah flour, eggs, and oil or schmaltz. I think you could make flour dumplings and they would be a reasonable stand-in. Or do chicken soup with egg noodles. Either way it's making do with what there is, but yeah, that's kind of the spirit in which we're all navigating the holiday this year.

(ETA: obvs if you are getting rid of all of your hametz / leavenable stuff, then the noodles or bread-flour dumplings are not a good option. This is not an official halakhic opinion. Et cetera. :-)

[rachelmanija]

if you are getting rid of all of your hametz / leavenable stuff

Hahahaha no. ;)

Thanks! Hmm. I might do crushed raw garlic.

[forestofglory]

I've always kind of wanted to try making matzo, so please report back with how that works out.

I found almost enough matzo meal left over form last year. I supplement as needed with some crushed matzo. I don't plan to crush it as finely as the meal is ground -- just put in plastic bag an wack it with a rolling pin.

This morning I made a fritata with caramelized onions. I also put together so charost -- only half an apples worth since we never seem to eat up the left overs.

I have am just going to reuse the Haggadah form last year. I have one I put together for our family use that has poem about robots and blessing for farm workers. Its short as these things go and all in English.

I've invited my parents to join us via Zoom. I am going to invite some other people too.

[rachelmanija]

I'll try the matzo today, so if it's a disaster there's time to try again.

[naomikritzer]

I hope you saw the screenshot making the rounds of the person on FB saying, basically, "the most meaningful Seder you could possibly do this year is the one pieced together from what you had." I also liked this person's take: "I'm just putting it out there that while Seder plates are beautiful, they're just plates. The symbolic foods that go on them are symbolic. Anything that symbolizes sacrifice, sweetness, bitterness, renewel, freedom will work. If you want to do a Seder, you have the stuff you need"

[rachelmanija]

No! Link me if you find it.

[havocthecat]

I think if you make something with a bone, you should be fine! We had basically everything on hand for Passover because I'm kind of a food hoarder. (Except lettuce, I never have lettuce. We double up on parsley nearly every year.) Though in one of my infrequent store runs I did buy a fresh jar of horseradish because Mr. Havoc really loves his spice. I gave most spice up so the kidlet could have food he loved and Mr. Havoc dumps bunches of spicy sauces on everything.

I second everyone's dumpling ideas! Also dumplings are nom.

I mean, anything spicy will stand in for horseradish, even hot sauce, or, hell, cayenne mixed with a little water will do you.

We always just hardboil the eggs. We are lazy, and most Passovers we work and commute.

Also, if you confit that duck leg, will you post pictures? OMG, that sounds good!

I'm a big believer in making things work in times of trouble, and this is a TIME OF AFFLICTION. This year is the most Passover. Like, seriously, the kidlet brought home a plague of lice either from the haircut he had a week before the shelter in place, or from school, and we've been dealing with that. (I have never been so glad to have skipped the haircut place before.)

The shampoo to get rid of lice is derived from ragweed, which is the thing I am the most allergic to, so I've been wheezing like a motherfucker thanks to the hit from that. Even though I have washed my hair several times to get rid of the smell, and used my inhaler. THIS YEAR IS THE MOST PASSOVER.

[rachelmanija]

I can't believe you got lice! At least it wasn't boils.

[cynthia1960]

May you have a good Passover.

[princessofgeeks]

Wishing you a wonderful and meaningful holiday.

[muccamukk]

It really is sounding like the most passover, passover. I wish you a good holiday, and that the angel of death passes over your house (and everyone else's houses!)

[sholio]

I know nothing about roasting eggs, but from all the mentions of exploding eggs in the comments, I am just laughing at how much an egg-roasting oven explosion would be a Thing That Would Happen To Rachel.

[rachelmanija]

I had that exact thought.

[larryhammer]

It’ll be just the three of us, which yes feels very in keeping with the occasion but also not. We have just about all the supplies we need except horseradish (sub suggestions anyone?). Wine is leftover from last year, and the bitter herb Eaglet potted in Hebrew school for the occasion.

[branna]

It’s just the three of us too, and we are currently very ill-equipped. I like the wasabi idea for the maror.

[watersword]

There was a whole "wealthy foodie" thing a while back about hand-forged cast-iron egg spoons and roast eggs in a coal or wood hearth, but somehow I don't think that's the question you're asking.

I am seriously considering just making myself a plate of matzoh brie for dinner and calling it "good enough" because the prospect of trying to scale my Seder recipes down to one person makes me blanch.

[adrian_turtle]

You cannot make technically-correct, perfectly-kosher-for-Passover, matzo without official Passover flour, which I've never seen in a store even in ordinary years. You may not care about such technicalities. This is a sensory holiday, so if it looks and feels right that might be all you need. If you want matzo ball soup like you remember eating at your grandparents' seder, crushing a few matzos with a rolling pin will get you enough crumbs. I would advise AGAINST noodles or flour-based dumplings. They push against the mood. If you don't want to make matzo-ball soup, you can just put potato in the soup. Potato and other root vegetables are always Passover appropriate.

This recipe comes from the generally reliable Joan Nathan's Jewish Holiday Kitchen, and it warns that it produces matzos that are not kosher for Passover. I have not been inspired to make them for any other holidays.

3 cups flour and 1 cup water

Preheat oven to 550 degrees F
Place flour on a board and slowly add the water, kneading the dough with your hands until it is firm. Take a handful and roll it out into a circle using a long rolling pin. Prick it on one side with a fork.
Place it in the oven on a cookie sheet for about 6 minutes on the first side, then turn over for the remaining 2 minutes.

[rachelmanija]

Thanks! Don't worry, I'm not attempting actual kosher. I just want it to feel like Passover.

[redrikki]

Oh, man, I totally forgot about charoset. My temple is Zooming our traditional second night seder. I thought I was all set with my meal and my two types of terrible cooking wine, etc., but it turns out I'm not! My veggie friends use a plastic dinosaur for their sacrifice, so that's what I'm going with this year.

I hope you have a good and healthy Passover.

[rachelmanija]

My veggie friends use a plastic dinosaur for their sacrifice

LOLOLOLOL, that's even better than the year we got a bag of rubber plagues.

[coffeeandink]

I was just reading an article that mentioned roasted eggs!

https://www.nytimes.com/2012/03/28/dining/countdown-to-a-passover-seder.html

[rymenhild]

I'm all in on making do with what we have this year. I'm going to print out a picture of a shankbone if I have time. I think I'll be able to do a socially-distanced apple handoff from my inlaws for the charoset. If not, well, there's a story about Jews who didn't have fruit in some time of need. Charoset is symbolic mortar, so they used a real brick. If necessary, I will place a Lego on my seder plate.

[rachelmanija]

Wow, that's an amazing story.

[rosefox]

I think I have horseradish sauce somewhere in the fridge. If I don't, what's a good substitute?

My backup plan is mustard.

I have eggs. Has anyone ever tried roasting rather than boiling them?

My mother taught me to gently tap the egg all over to lightly crack the shell and then boil it with dark onion skin or a couple of teabags so the hard-boiled egg comes out with a pattern of brown cracks all over it.